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You know you've been in (German speaking) Switzerland too long when ...
you think sponteniaty is OK, as long as it's planned. you get upset in the train when a foreign tourist opens the window causing a draft to go down your back. you know the words to the Swiss national anthem. you prefer to buy in small shops even though its more expensive. you think joining clubs is an acceptable way of meeting people socially. you start studying for a Nachdiplom. you get annoyed when the car ahead of you doesn't turn off it's motor at a traffic light. you look forward to Wildsaison. you're prepared to pay for a local dentist. you're not upset when a public holiday falls on a Sunday. you buy Swiss. you get concerned about all the foreigners moving into the country. you approve of school on Saturday mornings. you don't mind spending all day in the restaurant at a ski resort, and wonder why all the foreigners insist on skiing when the conditions are less than optimal. you know the difference between Cafe Traesh, and Cafe Luetz, and get upset when others don't know. you become suspicious of people who think independently. you decide on a vacation in the US, planning to buy a car and drive around for six months. you can comment on the quality of english schools in southern England and California. you consider taking a vacation to Florida, but then don't go, because it's too dangerous. you pull out in front of another car, to reserve your place. you reserve your table first, before getting food in a cafeteria. you don't worry about your jacket being stolen in a restaurant. you get upset when someone pays with a credit card, instead of paying cash. you feel embarassed when your squash racket grip doesn't match your socks. you wish the Swiss government would do something about their refugee policy. you hope Switzerland doesn't join the European community. you consider food with garlic in it to be spicy. you get embarassed when a visitor asks for a doggie bag in a restaurant. you are willing to pay higher prices, because it ensures higher quality. you consider target shooting a 'sport'. you assume that all asians are refugees. you start judging restaurants and hotels, giving criticism when your expections are not met. you start refering to the French speaking Swiss as Welsh. you don't mind waiting in restaurants. you take a foreign language course, in German. you stop going out on Monday and Tuesday nights, because you have to work the next day, but always go out on Thursday nights. you know the difference between a Landsprach and an Amtsprach. you think that Generalversammulung is an important event. you entertain in restaurants. you decline an invitation because you have to clean your apartment. you don't take part in a sporting activity, because you're not dressed for it. you consider it normal to make reservations to see a movie. you are glad of the pause during a movie, so that you can smoke a cigarette and buy an ice cream. you consider it healthy to eat lots of milk products and lean red meat. you realize the subversive implications of doing something 'just for fun'. you think that milk and butter prices should be regulated. you worry about the economic hardships that Swiss farmers face. you consider getting goats and sheep to graze in your backyard. you become interested in the myriad of insurance offerings. you call the police when you see someone washing their car on a Sunday. you start complaining about the breakdown of traditional Swiss values. you think that Sunday should be a day of rest. you volunteer to help organize the Dorffest. you aren't surprised when a perfectly good road is torn up and repaved. you buy a new ski suit every year. you feel comforted by public safety announcements. you start judging the quality of the whipped cream. you think that Switzerland's conservation efforts make a difference. you think that hard work is responsible for the stability of the Swiss franc |